Monday, May 29, 2006

Schoko?

This almost makes me want to learn German. From what I can gather from the cognates, this is a chocolate museum in Cologne, and there are SAMPLES involved.

Then again, chocolate museums are not all they’re cracked up to be. I once went to one in Brussels, and it was little more than a series of exhibits in which cheap mannequins wearing 70s-style hairpieces demonstrated the chocolate-making process. In one particularly memorable display, an Amazonian tribe picked cocoa beans under the hot Brazilian sun, their bangs and shag cuts grazing the surface of their loin cloths.

There was also a multicultural look at chocolate from around the world, which basically demonstrated that the pure and noble people of the world’s oppressed countries eat dark chocolate, while the oppressors themselves like to add a lot of sugar to their chocolate and decorate it with superfluous designs.

The museum’s final room held a demonstration in which a grumpy Renault factory worker poured warm chocolate into molds, describing the process first in French, then in Flemish, and then finally in a tired, much abbreviated English. We all got to keep one chocolate from his demonstration. Then we were promptly pushed out of the room and into the chocolate boutique, whose peeling walls and bags of stale chocolate nearly made me cry.

If you’re going to build a chocolate museum, I think this is the way you’ve got to go: chocolate roller coaster, chocolate spa, chocolate samples, and--for the kids:
• Chocolate Toss (ages 3-6)
• Chocolate Hunt (ages 3-6)
• Hershey Kiss Bingo (ages 5 and up)
• Name that Candy Bar (ages 7 and up)

What was the science behind Hershey's decision that kids' awareness of chocolate brands is developed by age seven? Or that once you reach the end of your 6th year you have grown too old and jaded to experience the magic of the chocolate toss and chocolate hunt?

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8 comments:

Mr. Takahashi-san said...

How about one of them doodads with the balls that you can jump around in except the balls are made out of chocolate?

Moko said...

oh wow. mr. takahashi san. wow.

BLOOD AMBITION 2006 said...

I just visited Hershey's Chocolate World and the Hershey Museum a little less than a week ago. Let me tell you, it was a magical experience.

Moko said...

noooooo! you got to go before me?!?! figures. rock stars get to do everything. they probably gave you and the other band folks chocolate busts, or created a The Blood Arm chocolate bar for you.

of course, all will be forgiven if you thought to bring me some samples...and don't let it melt before you make it to london!

small time tom said...

hmm, wow, i've got to say that my Hershey Museum visit in Hershey, PA of 2000 was one of the biggest disappointments of 2000. As I recall, no endless free samples were to be had. In fact, I don't recollect a single free sample. A far cry from the Coca Cola experience in Atlanta, which can make you sick for days in that good way...

Moko said...

no samples at all? that's so...unamerican!

i went to a coca cola museum in tokyo and it was the weirdest thing. there were coca cola cars and coca cola panda bears and you could buy a coca cola soda, but there was nothing there that made you feel like you were connecting with coca cola on a deeper, more intimate level.

at the hersehy museum, however, there's supposed to be a chocolate spa with a signature chocolate mud bath. i can't imagine a better way to commune with chocolate than to let the sweet goodness seep into your skin and soul.

steve the ripper said...

well, maybe they took my comment card to heart...

Moko said...

i love filling those out! i'm so glad to know i'm not the only one...