- The freaky chocolate children of Moscow
- Cadbury Offers to Pay £1 of Your Hospital Bill
- Poor Ireland gets stuck with Time Out
- Halloween in England
- The long walk home
- UPDATE: My One-Month Plan to Seduce the Chocolate Man
- Cocaine is not Candy, Boys and Girls
- Turndown Service
- A Daily, 5-Second Vacation for The Chosen
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Kit Kat Gets a Penis
It’s called the Kit Kat Chunky, and it’s the best thing to happen to the Nestle brand since they decided to inject air into the Crunch bar.
The new bar is a fantastic, masculine alternative to the traditional, feminine Kit Kat. And it tastes SO much better. It’s c-h-u-n-k-y and very satisfying.
I received two free bars during the World Cup and offered to split one with my football-watching partners, Jesus and God. (Jesus, if you remember, is “everyone’s favorite energy reporter”. God is simply God by dint of the fact that he’s Jesus’ editor. Beyond moving megawatts, though, I don’t think he’s all that powerful.)
Anyway, never in my fifty years of chocolate eating have I seen such an over-the-top success.
Do you people in other countries have this new Kit-Kat, too? Or is this only in England? If so, this would be the first good reason I’ve ever heard to live in this country.