- The freaky chocolate children of Moscow
- The long walk home
- Cadbury Offers to Pay £1 of Your Hospital Bill
- Poor Ireland gets stuck with Time Out
- Halloween in England
- UPDATE: My One-Month Plan to Seduce the Chocolate Man
- Cocaine is not Candy, Boys and Girls
- Turndown Service
- A Daily, 5-Second Vacation for The Chosen
Friday, September 22, 2006
35p Pack of Joy
Unlike most sugarphiles, I do not turn my nose up at fake sugar. On the contrary—and barring the cases of Diet Coke and Sugarfree Mentos—I think any sugar is good sugar: brown sugar, white sugar, sugar cane, sugar puff, burnt sugar, creamed sugar, crispy sugar, and yes—fake sugar.
So it perhaps comes as no surprise that my latest love—Cadbury’s Highlights—are totally filled with fakery.
But I swear you wouldn’t know it.
Or okay, you would…but only if you tend to have that thick Italian hot chocolate each morning as you munch on a biscotti and wonder with whom you will dine that afternoon (and whether you will properly avoid placing your prepositions at the end of sentences).
The normal amongst you, however, drink crap hot chocolate. Starbucks is crap hot chocolate. Dunkin’ Donuts is crap hot chocolate. And most certainly, any hot chocolate made with water is crap hot chocolate.
But not Cadbury’s Highlights—particularly the toffee flavor. It’s very creamy and thick, and I’m convinced they must be throwing in some sort of animal bones or something to make this so tasty. (Anything good always seems to have animals in it—I just don’t want to know.)
I’m so in love with these things that I want to share them with you. So help me herald this new sensation in sugar fakery by completing this sales pitch. The winner gets some packets of Highlights. Yep, this is H-U-G-E.
Cadbury’s Highlights—They're the next _____.
Categories: Cadbury, chocolate, sugar, marketing